blur me...

had a really tired day today...

argh...hope tmrw i can get a bus ticket back to KL neh..... T.T

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Friday 29/8/08

Today my training centre had the merdeka celebration...

children....im sorry,sooo sorry, ur teacher me is so dumb and stupiak lar....

i actally had the camera wif me, but all of u look great honey!

love u all my darlings....preferably to call u all..my honey.......:P:P

i'm tired..

the skies are grey,

i'm so tired of being alone,

no shoulder to lean when i feel like crying,

no hugs and kisses every moment of every day,

i know i'm not waiting for you anymore, i've learn that it's just simply impossible for me to love u furthur,

i know i didn't stop, i just didn't wanna continue,

i know there's a him, i smell love, i sense him,

who?

maybe God's knows for now,

i feel so sad,

being alone,

with all the pressure and the unhappiness,

i have so much to say,

so much to do,

yet you keep me outside ur door over and over again,

i don't feel like crying even if tears are rolling in my eyes,

cause you said, strong gurls dun cry...

for good purpose, i wanna be the strong gurl,

i and you has choosen frenship as our route,

yet why, i still can't see you,

feel you,

a concrete you,

i wanna juz fall into an arm that's open for me, just for me to cry and sleep and take a rest, and would tell me, "baby, it's ok, i'll be here for you..i love you"

o...god, pls tell me where's the guy that you've send to test love once again,

i can take challenge, love makes everything possible,

love me, then him, then me....

i can't forever stay strong,

i wanna rest,

yet i have so much burden, so much so much, that i couldn't let go, yet...

i have friends, but they're all over the world, none within my reach of arm, that i could see and touch, now,

i love them, i miss them, i want them...

and yet, why some of them keep me out of bound...

i wanna be in their world, i am partially, yet not,

if tears could drain me dry, i wish it would,

cause i juz have too much burden tat says no for me to drain dry...

i love myself more than anything yet...

i just want to feel love again, i can't see my future, my tomorrow, so pls, for today, i wish i could have him, a dinner or a movie could keep me alive days after days...

yet days after days, there's just a no and a no and a no....

if God closes one door and open another window, pls do it now...

i can't hold on anymore......not by myself anymore.....

Aidan's little story

Today, my baby Aidan has quite a number of funny stuffs that can keep me laughing all day...

Well, at first, in class, while he is playing those blocks, there is one silly face toy that has holes in it, so this baby of mine, for some reason, poke his tiny winy finger into the hole, i think he squeeze it in hard, so when he's trying to take it off, it wouldn't come off his finger when he tried to take it off, he swing his finger, the second one on his right hand, i think, and the third swing he finally swing it off, and he don't even wanna be near that thing for the rest of the block-time...

i was laughing at the table, i wanted to help him take it off, but i wanted to see how's he gonna shook it off or see if he's gonna ask for help...

haha..i know i'm bad....well, it's funny u kw....he's damn cute....wish i brought the camera, but i guess the eye's is the best camera, and my memory is the filem....:P

then during the bathing time, after the bath and all, i apply his allergic cream for him, he was trying to pluck something off his arm, then i thought there's something as he's trying real hard to pluck it off, then i found out it's his hair, i mean, those hair on his arms, it's kinda long and quite alot over his hands..

so, i asked him, what are you doing Aidan?

then he replied, there's alot of hair falling onto his hand, then i check, and well, i said those are your hairs on ur arm..

then he say, "i dun like it Ms.Grace, where did the hair fall from?"

i laugh real hard and finally found the strength to reply him, "Well, Aidan, hair grow out from your body, they don't fall..."

he replied, "But i DON'T like these hair..."

and he's still trying to pluck it off...

then i ask him, "Y u dun like it Aidan? You don't like it izit?"

then he frown and he replied me, "No..i dun like it.."

then i tell him, suddenly my brain become so active, "Well, if you grow up faster and taller abit, then the hair will fall off, so if u want to grow up, you have to eat more later on ok?"

then he nod and go off...

haha...he's my real baby...sooo cute..

nowdays he reli smile at me, with the real smile showing his two deep dimple..

oh...Aidan, i love you, wish i could make you my God-Son honey....i love you, juz like how you reply me, "I love you.."

and today, when his grandpa pick him up from childcare, when he was shoove into the car, he fould the milo packet that his grandpa brought him, and his grandpa is laughing real hard..

i can imagine how he's gona drink it and never will forget the surprise and happy look on his lil angelic face...

and today, during the bathing time, my other baby, Hong Li darling accidentally knock into Aidan, i wanna experiment by saying sorry for Hong Li to him, and he react abit slower but the same as Johahn, "no..it's not you, it's xxx"...

man.....no one cud be sweeter than those lil honey of mine...;)

me and my children..........

these are some of the pix i took in the skol.....

it's really badly taken, as u kw, children move like thunder, haha....:P

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Ashley and me





My Ashley Chin writing her name


Aidan honey~







Amber baby & I






My Aidan Clive de Alvis






Bubbly Kids






Lee Jean sweetie pie






Yi Shun(the devil wif angelic look), Benjamin & Pak Su Bin

these are a few of our few photo's together, and i hope we can fill in books and books of photo album in the coming days.. :)

p/s: we love Cecilia Ahem's "P.S. I love you", and we love pink~!

---@----

Grace & Mary Grace

We & Icey

Classic!

Grace & Grace

08.08.08

today i met up with Mary Grace, my twin from another mother and born in a different year, we've known each other for years, ever since SSV, JB...

this is the second meet up in so many years after SSV Tragedy....yes, it's indeed a tragedy...

so, today, like last time, we met in Sunway, and becoz of my damn work, and the damn Friday, and the damn jam, i was late for one and a half hour!!!!!!

thx god Grace was kind enuf to forgive me... T.T

well, we ate at Dragon-i, a chinese restaurant, always wanted to go there, look so unique, it's really good, good quality food and quality price too...haha..

we ate the Wantan Noodle, SiChuan Stone-Rice, 6piece Beijing Bun, and i drank the winter melon with sea-coconut and longan and Gracey twin only drank warm water..

both of us is down with flu and me with the extra cough ting, but we still decided to go for Baskin Robin, we had the Chocolate twist or smting and the Strawberry with Banana...

we're so much like twins, everything we like or dislike, so much in common and we even wear the same cutting of shirt!!!

haha...oh well, when i met up wif her at Starbuck like last time, i actually sense that she's near u kw..haha..tats scary aye~

today is the open ceremony of Olympic Beijing 2008, man.....wish i could watch it...no TV... T.T

hehehe...oh well, but me and Grace had a great time together, so it's ok, there's no time-rewine-machine but a record for Olypic, so it's worth it...

we actually wanted to catch a movie together but we were 5min late, so we decided not to opt for it...

and at the end, i asked Grace whether i could stay overnite at her house, and yes, i did!!!

haha...it's like my own house...haha..oh well, ahem, i mean, yes, i treat it like my house, we talk so much, our future, the past, frens, boyfrens, family, etc.

alot of gurl-talk, and we're even thinking of studying together at UNLV Singapore too!

hope i could someway or another get in there, i really want to be with my frens and family, close to ppl i trust with absolute and my home...

wish i oculd be with my Rebel4 frenz, but well, God plan it that way so that i could enjoy more and see more before it's all set..

so, pls God, let me enter UNLV without obstacle, that's all i want for now, and of coz, the health and happiness of ppl whom i love with the bottom of my heart and life...



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09.08.08


today, i woke up around 11.50am, haha...gracey has already woke up and does her revision work, and read two chapter of "P.S. I love you"...

we talk more, watch a DVD, "The Heartbreakin Kid" or smting...

haha...we're like commenting about it, the story, ppl, etc..

then before i went off around 4, we ate at a Mamak stall at the Menari Court and had the Nasi Goreng Kampung tak pedas one(hehe ^^"), and it took like ages to come and when we ask, "If it's not cook, pls cancel the order", they actually serve to us in less than 1min and the rice is like so wet with old and maybe over-cook veggie's according to Gracey twin...haha...

it's the longest time we've ever spend together, after so long and it's the first time we sleep together and talk till we fall asleep without knowing....

and what Gracey and i chat about at Dragon-i, "frenship never changes, it doesn't matter if you haven't met for ages or haven't contact for as long as u can remember..."